Slutty Peasants

[00:00] Yeah, exactly right.
[00:01] I mean, you want to spend a lot more time looking in the mirror than out the window
[00:04] during the regular season, right?
[00:06] Sure.
[00:10] I'm going to put that on a coffee mug.
[00:13] Yeah.
[00:16] Put that, put that, that's a cozy quote.
[00:18] Keep that one down.
[00:22] Okay.
[00:24] Next up, Coalson, you got an un-Googleable for us?
[00:28] I do.
[00:36] Oh, we do want to un-Googleables?
[00:38] That was the plan.
[00:39] I'm super excited.
[00:40] You told us we had to, sir.
[00:44] You said we signed up for it.
[00:48] In the end, it's going to be better and more true than Google can give you.
[00:52] So it's a holiday season.
[00:54] I was watching a holiday movie with the lady
[00:59] while you were sleeping, the great Sandra Bullock,
[01:02] uh, rom-com, uh, in fact, uh, shout out to, uh, falling in love with trip and brick.
[01:09] They did a, they did a pot on this one.
[01:12] So we'll link to that.
[01:13] But, um, in that movie, uh, Sandra Bullock, uh, basically saves a guy
[01:18] who's, uh, fallen unconscious, uh, unconscious, but she ends up falling in love
[01:24] with the unconscious dude's brother.
[01:26] And there's this really awkward moment where they're, the brother and she are
[01:31] standing under the mistletoe, um, and the family is asking them to, to kiss,
[01:36] which, you know, is kind of awkward in the sense that, um, her fiance in all
[01:42] their minds is, uh, unconscious, but really it's okay.
[01:46] Cause she's in love with the brother.
[01:47] It works out.
[01:50] I take all this to say I'm watching this going.
[01:53] This is an incredibly weird thing, not only in that movie, but also in general
[01:58] that we, that this mistletoe idea that we were under the mistletoe with somebody,
[02:04] even if it's awkward to kiss them, we're expected to kiss them.
[02:07] And I'm trying to figure out where this came from.
[02:10] Um, why do we have the tradition of the mistletoe?
[02:14] Hmm, I'm going to guess it's, uh, in the, in the long tradition of, uh, creepy
[02:23] old white men, that's where it comes from.
[02:25] Okay.
[02:29] So old white dudes are like, this is going to be a great opportunity for me.
[02:32] Yeah.
[02:32] We're just going to have this thing.
[02:34] Like, oh, you know, this, there's this weird plant and you know, if you go under it,
[02:40] you have to kiss me.
[02:41] That's the thing.
[02:42] So it, it, it, it got its start on madmen.
[02:45] Yeah, maybe advertising agencies in the seventies.
[02:48] Exactly.
[02:49] It's where the mistletoe.
[02:50] Yeah.
[02:52] Okay.
[02:53] Or like Henry the eighth or something like that.
[02:55] It seems like some, some creepy thing that he would do.
[02:58] He just wanted to kiss as many young maidens as he could.
[03:00] Yeah, that's the thing with Kings though.
[03:03] I don't think they needed it.
[03:04] Yeah.
[03:04] They could just do the pre-monocta thing.
[03:06] Right.
[03:06] And yeah, exactly.
[03:08] Like this feels, this feels more peasantied to me.
[03:12] Okay.
[03:13] So maybe, maybe like a shitty noble guy.
[03:17] Yeah.
[03:18] Well, so first I'm going to say European.
[03:21] Okay.
[03:22] Yeah.
[03:22] Okay.
[03:24] I'm going to say it must be Northern European.
[03:28] Right.
[03:28] Because mistletoe seems like some place that will grow some place relatively cold.
[03:33] Sure.
[03:34] Yeah.
[03:34] I don't, I mean, I don't know.
[03:35] No, I actually do know this about mistletoe is that it,
[03:40] it actually grows in the winter.
[03:42] And that's why it's a, that's why it's a garland for, for Christmas.
[03:46] Because it, it actually,
[03:48] so you need to have the winter to survive.
[03:50] Yeah, exactly.
[03:50] They need winter.
[03:51] Yeah.
[03:52] So I'm going to say it's, you know, like I said, this is a, you know,
[03:58] slutty peasants, basically, can I, can I say that on the radio?
[04:03] All right.
[04:03] It's probably the title of the show now.
[04:07] Merry Christmas, slutty peasants.
[04:12] So we think it Anglo Saxon or more like Irish Scottish.
[04:17] Oh, Irish Scottish.
[04:18] Okay.
[04:18] Well, so, okay.
[04:22] I was thinking a couple things.
[04:23] One, is this another situation where the Catholics steal it from the.
[04:30] The pagans.
[04:32] The Druins or whatever the pagans.
[04:34] The other thing I was thinking is, is that Shakespeare come up with this for a story
[04:39] plot and that's how I become something.
[04:41] Because it's always either the pagans or the Shakespeare or falconry.
[04:46] That could, maybe it's Christopher Wren this time.
[04:49] Could be, could be.
[04:52] I'm going to go with it.
[04:53] I'm going to go with it's not Germanic because Germans never have any fun.
[04:58] And this sounds too fun for that's a good point.
[05:00] Yeah.
[05:00] This is much too flirty and frivolous.
[05:03] And yeah, joie de vivre.
[05:05] Yeah, exactly.
[05:06] It's not their thing.
[05:08] So is it French?
[05:11] It definitely could be French.
[05:16] Mistletoe.
[05:17] I don't know if that sounds, who knows?
[05:19] Well, I mean, it may have a different name in French.
[05:23] Okay.
[05:24] Yeah.
[05:26] All right.
[05:26] So we're going with it's, uh, old school, cold European country and.
[05:33] European middle ages.
[05:35] Done by slutty peasants.
[05:37] Slutty pests.
[05:40] Check.
[05:42] All right.
[05:43] See what we can come up with.
[05:45] All you gotta do is come to us team.
[05:47] We always figure it out for you.
[05:51] Okay.
[05:54] Weirdly, mistletoe, uh, is a partial parasite or a Hemi parasite.
[06:02] Parasitic branch.
[06:07] The custom of kissing under mistletoe comes from England.
[06:11] The original custom was that a berry was picked from the sprig of a mistletoe
[06:15] before the person could be kissed.
[06:17] And when all the berries had gone, there could be no more kissing.
[06:21] So we were right.
[06:23] It was English and probably buttoned by creepy white dudes.
[06:27] Um, I've got here that the Greeks were known to use it, uh, as a cure, uh, mistletoe as
[06:33] a cure for everything from menstrual cramps to spleen disorders and the natural spliny,
[06:39] the elder used as a ball.
[06:41] It always comes back to fly knee or Shakespeare.
[06:45] Um, the romantic overtones most likely started with the, uh, druids of the first century.
[06:51] Solid because mistletoe could blossom even during the frozen winter.
[06:54] The druids came to view it as a sacred symbol of vivacity.
[06:59] So I have a different, I have a, the kissing under the mistletoe is first
[07:04] associated with the Greek festival of Saturnalia, uh, and later with primitive marriage rates.
[07:11] Hmm.
[07:14] Oh, okay.
[07:15] So it's Scandinavian.
[07:16] There's also a nor here's a Norse offshoot.
[07:20] Um, Odin's son, Baldur was prophesied to die.
[07:23] His mother frig, the goddess of love went to all the animals and plants, uh, to secure an
[07:28] oath that they would not harm him, but frig neglected to consult with the unassuming mistletoe.
[07:34] So Loki made an arrow from the plant.
[07:36] With the mistletoe, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta talk to the missile stuff.
[07:41] Can't overlook it in because it was a partial parasite.
[07:44] That's why she, uh, the custom linked to mistletoe was reserved for new year's day.
[07:49] Uh, but today kisses can be exchanged under the mistletoe any time during
[07:53] the holiday season, according to the holiday spot.com sexual harassment.com.
[08:02] Uh, your honor, I would like to enter into evidence.
[08:10] Um, so are you talking about Loki?
[08:13] I got excited.
[08:13] I'm a Marvel nerd.
[08:14] What happened with Loki and the mistletoe?
[08:17] Uh, Loki made an arrow from the plant and used it to kill the otherwise invincible Baldur.
[08:22] Who's the son of Odin.
[08:24] Um, wow.
[08:27] According to one son, your version of the myth, the gods were able to resurrect Baldur.
[08:31] Uh, and frig then declared mistletoe, a symbol of love and vowed to plant a
[08:36] kiss on all those who passed beneath it.
[08:38] Okay.
[08:39] All right.
[08:40] That's amazing.
[08:41] It's like every tradition has incorporated this missile to this stupid plant in the same way.
[08:53] But so all those things come together, uh, for the slutty peasants, essentially.
[09:00] So they edit.
[09:01] So what is our default here?
[09:02] We attribute it to the oldest version of this and assume that it just got
[09:07] mutated into these different.
[09:10] Well, so we got through it.
[09:11] We got drinks and we got, um, Norse Greeks likely would predate the druids.
[09:17] Okay.
[09:21] They're man.
[09:23] Gosh, you wouldn't think that there would be much
[09:25] cultural exchange between the Druids and Greeks, wouldn't you?
[09:30] It'd be a lot of murder.
[09:31] Or the norse, right?
[09:33] Or the norse.
[09:34] Yeah.
[09:34] Seem like very separate.
[09:37] Historical entities.
[09:38] That's, that's pretty crazy.
[09:39] I mean, the good news is that we're, regardless of what we had answered,
[09:42] we were pretty much going to be right.
[09:46] Good.
[09:46] Good for us.
[09:46] It's my kind of under Google bowl.
[09:48] Nice work.
[09:49] I do it again.
[09:50] One last question.
[09:51] Can we get it?
[09:52] Can we get a, uh, uh, an etymology for the actual term missile toe?
[09:58] Do we know where that means poo on a stick?
[10:01] What?
[10:06] So I did go to, I don't, I'm a little
[10:11] skeptical of the quality of the site, but why christmas.com
[10:16] says that missile M I S T E L, which means dung and tan, which means twig or stick.
[10:23] So you could translate missile toe as poo on a stick.
[10:29] Yeah.
[10:30] It's, it's from the German missile.
[10:33] That's what I'm saying to you.
[10:34] Okay.
[10:35] Wow.
[10:38] Super romantic.
[10:39] Well, there's gotta be, does it, it probably grows in poop or something, right?
[10:46] Well, it's, it grows on trees, which it is odd.
[10:51] I guess a shrubbery.
[10:52] We go, um, missiles.
[10:53] So is spread through birds feces.
[10:59] So cause the birds eat the berries and then poop.
[11:02] It's possible that that's where it comes from it.
[11:04] This is great.
[11:06] So yeah, this means it means poop branch.
[11:09] And that's what I've got here.
[11:15] We've ruined christmas holidays.
[11:17] Just know next time you have this wonderful romantic moment under the
[11:21] missile toe, it's actually under a poop branch.
[11:23] Yep.
[11:24] Yep.
[11:25] And reuse were derived from, you know, uh, the, uh, laurels that we placed on dead
[11:31] people's heads after we murdered them.
[11:32] Merry Christmas.
[11:38] Oh, Europeans.
[11:39] You're welcome.
[11:39] Pacers fans.
[11:43] If you are enjoying your christmas break with your family and you can share this
[11:48] nugget with them over dinner tonight, it'll be great.
[11:50] Sure.
[11:51] We do.
[11:52] Well, in the current climate, you shouldn't be using missile tone anyway.
[11:55] Just don't do it.
[11:56] It's not worth it.
[11:57] It seems like maybe in, maybe in any climate,
[12:02] we do want to thank you for listening, um, to the show.
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[12:35] but also head over to the website and buy yourself a t-shirt.
[12:38] It would be great.
[12:39] It's a great christmas gift or new year's gift.
[12:42] Whatever, whenever this comes out too late, we should do our promotion earlier.
[12:49] I'll be right before the new year here.
[12:50] Yeah.
[12:51] I've talked to our PR department.
[12:52] Yep.
[12:53] That's right.
[12:55] For a once in a while, coach, Bobby Sclinard.
[12:59] Turn out the last, the party's over.
[13:04] Happy new year.
[13:12] Party's over, buddy.
[13:13] Time to go home.
[13:13] Party's over, dude.
[13:15] Stop kissing under the poop branch.
[13:20] Nobody wants to see this.